Press the Suspicious Button
A graduation greeting that gets increasingly suspicious with every press.
Use TemplateRoast card examples
Browse the current template collection. You can personalize names, while each roast body stays pre-made.
Graduation
Interactive congratulations for graduates who cannot leave a suspicious button alone.
Birthday
Birthday burns for people who can laugh at another candle.
Happy Birthday, You Old Legend
Happy Birthday, Taylor. Another year older, somehow not wiser, and still making that everyone else's problem.
Use TemplateCongrats on Surviving Another Year
Congratulations, Taylor. You survived another year despite making decisions like your brain is still buffering.
Use TemplateAged Like Gas Station Sushi
Happy Birthday, Taylor. You aged like gas station sushi: technically still here, but nobody feels great about it.
Use TemplateFriends
Friendly roasts for people you genuinely like.
Thinking of You, Unfortunately
Thinking of you today, Taylor. Not on purpose. My brain just makes mistakes sometimes.
Use TemplateA Friendly Reminder
Dear Taylor, this is a friendly reminder that you are deeply annoying, but in a way I have chosen to tolerate.
Use TemplateYou Inspire Me to Lower My Expectations
Taylor, you inspire me. Mostly to lower my expectations, but inspiration is inspiration.
Use TemplateFantasy Football / Sports
League shame, scoreboard side-eye, and sports burns.
Official Fantasy Football Loser Notice
Official notice: Taylor has been found guilty of fantasy football malpractice. Punishment: public shame and one full offseason of hearing about it.
Use TemplateYour Team Is a Mess
Taylor, your team is a mess. Not unlucky. Not misunderstood. Just a lineup with bad vibes and worse decisions.
Use TemplatePlease Retire From Fantasy Football
Dear Taylor, for the good of the league, your family, and basic human dignity, please retire from fantasy football.
Use TemplateSibling / Family
Family-friendly friendly fire for siblings and relatives.
Mom Said I'm Still Better
Hey Taylor, Mom said she loves us equally, which is exactly what she has to say because society has rules.
Use TemplateBackup Child Certificate
Congratulations, Taylor. You have been officially recognized as the backup child. Important in theory. Used only in emergencies.
Use TemplateBuilt Different, Unfortunately
Taylor, you really are built different. Unfortunately, nobody has figured out why they built you like that.
Use TemplateWork-Safe
Office-safe cards for maximum side-eye and minimum HR drama.
Per My Last Roast
Per my last message, Taylor, I regret to inform you that you remain the problem.
Use TemplateProfessionally Concerned
Taylor, I'm not mad. I'm just professionally concerned about whatever it is you think you're doing.
Use TemplateProfessionally Roasted
Congratulations, Taylor. You have been professionally roasted in a respectful, inclusive, and deeply deserved manner.
Use TemplateRandom
Odd little cards for odd little moments.
Emergency Clown Alert
Emergency alert: Taylor has been detected doing clown behavior in a non-circus environment.
Use TemplateBrain Cell Out of Office
Taylor's last brain cell is currently out of office. Please expect delayed decision-making and suspicious confidence.
Use TemplateCertified Menace
This certifies that Taylor is a verified menace. Not dangerous. Just exhausting in a way science has not fully explained.
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